Doula on board and more changes

My birth experience with Laurel was beautiful. At the time, it was everything I wanted and I was in no way traumatized or made to feel bullied. During the birth I was hooked up to a pitocin drip, had an internal and external fetal monitor, had an IV, remained in the bed for the whole time I labored in the hospital, had an epidural and an episiotomy. However, since then my ideas of what I want my next birth experience to be have changed. After reading some very empowering birth stories in Ina Mae Garten's Guide to Childbirth and having some conversations with women who have given birth without medical or surgical intervention, I decided that was the path I wanted to take.

My first thought was to hire a doula. A doula is a woman who serves as a childbirth assistant to the mother (and the father) and offers support during labor, as well as education before and after the birth. I consulted a few different resources in my area to come up with a group of names. I kept hearing one name over and over...Angie. So Tim and I scheduled an appointment to meet with Angie and to see if she might be the doula we were looking for. One thing I specifically like about her is that she is a Certified Midwife, so in addition to her skills as a doula she has delivered many homebirth babies. I have to say, I immediately liked her and felt like this was exactly the woman I needed. She was friendly and upbeat and seemed to understand everything both I and Tim were telling her regarding what we wanted, what our fears were and why we were looking for a doula. I think she especially reassured Tim that things would be fine and that most emergencies she had personally witnessed were actually during medicated births, not otherwise.

On the way home I laughingly told Tim that I would have hired her on the spot, but I knew I needed to sleep on it and give Tim some more time to digest it all. This morning he woke up and told me, "I'm on board, call her and hire her today." Included in her services are chilbirth education classes (she'll be working one-on-one with us to focus on preparing for and coping with labor and delivery since we feel pretty confident about caring for a newborn and breastfeeding). She'll also attend a couple prenatal appointments with me and, of course, assist me during labor. She said she tries to spend a day or two postpartum also making sure I'm doing well and have everything I need.

Going into the pregnancy I had some reservations about the ability of my medical group to give me the support and freedom to give birth naturally in a hospital setting. (Homebirth was briefly discussed but ultimately the fear of something going wrong and the distance to the nearest NICU were obstacles we could not overcome). At one of my appointments I talked to the doctor about having a birth with few (if any) interventions and the possibility of bringing a doula and she was less than enthusiastic. In fact, she seemed completely unsupportive. In addition, there are eight different doctors in the practice who deliver (plus 3 nurse practitioners that you occasionally see for appointments) so there is no opportunity for a personal relationship.

The group I will now be seeing is a smaller practice of four delivering doctors. As a group they are much more respectful of trying to honor a mother's wish of how she wants the labor to go. Angie said she's worked with the group on many occasions and has a good relationship with them. This switch will also mean switching to a different hospital, which I will admit I was a little leary of because it is a much bigger facility. However, I believe they have the maternity ward fairly separated from everything else. I'm hoping that Tim and I will be able to schedule a tour soon.

Obviously I can't read the future and challenges or obstacles may come up that will require me to change my plans for this birth, but I'm optimistic that Tim and I have put ourselves in the best position we can (given the resources and facilities we have available to us) to welcome this baby into our family in a gentle and respectful way.

2 comments:

Pamela said...

Very cute post. Loved reading it. Thanks for sharing.

Take the test Caring For Toddlers and find out how good are you at caring for toddlers.

Nanny Fain said...

This child is so very lucky to have you and Tim as parents. You know what you want and what is best for you.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Doula on board and more changes

My birth experience with Laurel was beautiful. At the time, it was everything I wanted and I was in no way traumatized or made to feel bullied. During the birth I was hooked up to a pitocin drip, had an internal and external fetal monitor, had an IV, remained in the bed for the whole time I labored in the hospital, had an epidural and an episiotomy. However, since then my ideas of what I want my next birth experience to be have changed. After reading some very empowering birth stories in Ina Mae Garten's Guide to Childbirth and having some conversations with women who have given birth without medical or surgical intervention, I decided that was the path I wanted to take.

My first thought was to hire a doula. A doula is a woman who serves as a childbirth assistant to the mother (and the father) and offers support during labor, as well as education before and after the birth. I consulted a few different resources in my area to come up with a group of names. I kept hearing one name over and over...Angie. So Tim and I scheduled an appointment to meet with Angie and to see if she might be the doula we were looking for. One thing I specifically like about her is that she is a Certified Midwife, so in addition to her skills as a doula she has delivered many homebirth babies. I have to say, I immediately liked her and felt like this was exactly the woman I needed. She was friendly and upbeat and seemed to understand everything both I and Tim were telling her regarding what we wanted, what our fears were and why we were looking for a doula. I think she especially reassured Tim that things would be fine and that most emergencies she had personally witnessed were actually during medicated births, not otherwise.

On the way home I laughingly told Tim that I would have hired her on the spot, but I knew I needed to sleep on it and give Tim some more time to digest it all. This morning he woke up and told me, "I'm on board, call her and hire her today." Included in her services are chilbirth education classes (she'll be working one-on-one with us to focus on preparing for and coping with labor and delivery since we feel pretty confident about caring for a newborn and breastfeeding). She'll also attend a couple prenatal appointments with me and, of course, assist me during labor. She said she tries to spend a day or two postpartum also making sure I'm doing well and have everything I need.

Going into the pregnancy I had some reservations about the ability of my medical group to give me the support and freedom to give birth naturally in a hospital setting. (Homebirth was briefly discussed but ultimately the fear of something going wrong and the distance to the nearest NICU were obstacles we could not overcome). At one of my appointments I talked to the doctor about having a birth with few (if any) interventions and the possibility of bringing a doula and she was less than enthusiastic. In fact, she seemed completely unsupportive. In addition, there are eight different doctors in the practice who deliver (plus 3 nurse practitioners that you occasionally see for appointments) so there is no opportunity for a personal relationship.

The group I will now be seeing is a smaller practice of four delivering doctors. As a group they are much more respectful of trying to honor a mother's wish of how she wants the labor to go. Angie said she's worked with the group on many occasions and has a good relationship with them. This switch will also mean switching to a different hospital, which I will admit I was a little leary of because it is a much bigger facility. However, I believe they have the maternity ward fairly separated from everything else. I'm hoping that Tim and I will be able to schedule a tour soon.

Obviously I can't read the future and challenges or obstacles may come up that will require me to change my plans for this birth, but I'm optimistic that Tim and I have put ourselves in the best position we can (given the resources and facilities we have available to us) to welcome this baby into our family in a gentle and respectful way.

2 comments:

Pamela said...

Very cute post. Loved reading it. Thanks for sharing.

Take the test Caring For Toddlers and find out how good are you at caring for toddlers.

Nanny Fain said...

This child is so very lucky to have you and Tim as parents. You know what you want and what is best for you.

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